BILL'S: Gone Stupid

I started out as a big fan of the CMT series "Gone Country," at least until the last episode. At which time, I feel the sanity level went out the window with the taste of the house they filmed it in.

For those of you who do not know, "Gone Country" took seven celebrities from different genres, made them do some of the stupidest stunts, such as clean out barns, ride ATVs, and make dinner for John Rich's family. All of these things were to make these celebrities find the country side of themselves. They were paired with song writing teams and over a period of 10 days were told to write a song and perform it on stage in Nashville. The one who did the best at becoming country would get his single produced by John Rich and be on his way to becoming the next country superstar.

I hated the times John Rich actually came on the show, because of his cocky nature and self absorbed personality. He would always come on wearing rhinestone pants and full length fur coats which would make Liberace proud. His "country music" concerns included such comments as "I would kill for country music." He bought Barbara Mandrell's log cabin and put the group up for the show. The house had been changed from head to toe with painted portraits of himself and the contestants. And had useless items such as a wooden grizzly bear climbing one of the support columns inside. This bear would raise his arm to cover his eyes when the doorbell rang. Some things are just too country. But I got lost in the footlong doorknobs in the shapes of J and R on the doors.

The contestants were:

Carney Wilson. Famous for being part of Wilson Phillips, she had to fight her fears of being alone. She has overcome alot in her life, and to me has a great look to her. She quickly showed her great attitude on John Rich's challenges, and proved herself as an outstanding cook when cooking for the family. Her song was about her daughter and she quickly became the one everyone felt was the one to beat.

Maureen McCormick. Famous for being Marsha Brady and not for her solo album that was released a long time ago, she had to fight her nervousness and stage fright which took control of her during the first few episodes and the reputation of being Marsha, Marsha, Marsha every middle aged man's teenage wet dream, and still having that draw today. She also had to battle her need for a smoking partner, which she found in fellow smoker Bobby Brown. In the final episode, she got on stage and sang in front of a rowdy group. Her song and performance was extremely mellow, but she stopped the crowd and had almost everyone in the audience's attention with her words and feelings.

Diana DeGarmo. Famous for her time on American Idol as a pop princess, she had to fight to overcome her pop influences. She was criticized many times on being the baby of her group by her fellow contestants and for her being too pop by John Rich and even brought to tears because telling John Rich that she had always wanted to do country music brought on a fight from John Rich who did not like her answer. Her song was spot on in pitch and tune and made a dynamic performance which displayed all of her talents that took her far in American Idol. Personally, I thought it was still a little pop, but John Rich said it was pure country.

Sisqo. Famous for the group Dru Hill and his solo song "Thong Song" and many crazy dance moves. This guy had to overcome all stereotypes to make it. Again, his song to me sounded a little urban, but he was able to get the audience excited, until he broke out in dance and lost the attention of the audience. In my opinion, he should have been next to last in this contest, but what do I know. Obviously, I don't know what country is.

Bobby Brown. Famous for his boy band New Edition to his bad boy solo career to his even badder boy Whitney Houston husband reputation. The only struggle this guy had was to overcome his alcoholism, which lead him to drink himself to sleep many times, and his "sleep-walker urination" issue, where he would get up in the middle of the night and sleep walk to Dee Snider's bed and almost pee on him. He went through a life changing moment, when he went to the Children's Hospital and met a terminally ill child literally within moments of death. The meeting had him shaking and crying for hours afterward, but miraculously the child made a complete recovery after the meeting. His song dealt with his wanting to become a new man, and was extremely powerful. In my opinion, he proved his ability to break through all boundaries.

Dee Snider. Famous for being the lead of Twisted Sister. He came in with a bad attitude towards country music, but quickly changed as the contest continued. His competitive nature came out in full force. He quickly proved himself as the shoulder to cry on and a source of helpful information when others broke down, and always had to fight to keep from getting peed on at night. His song had people in the audience up on their feet dancing and feeling good. The only upbeat, just fun song on the show. His song dealt with the fact that he hadn't planned anything for life after the age of 30, and really brought down the house. Unfortunately, John Rich's father, who is a minister, was in the audience and Dee flipped the bird as well as shouting out the line "I can f*ck all night" and it quickly eliminated him from the competition. Other than that, I thought it showed that even country can use a boost and some fun. And the audience loved it.

Then there was Julio Iglesias, Jr. Famous for...well, having a famous father and brother. During a contest where the contestants had to perform a song they were famous for, Maureen couldn't get the nerve to get onstage, and Julio had the nerve to sing his father's song "To All The Girls I've Loved Before." Only he sang it with John Rich. During the linedance competition, Julio turned the linedance into a sexual innuendo. His song sounded more like a Latin Love Ballad, all the way down to breaking out in Spanish verse in the middle of the song. To me, this was clearly the last place person. There was absolutely nothing country about his song. But then came the thoughts of the first two episodes. In episode two, John Rich and Julio shared the father's song together. But in episode one, John Rich told Julio during their meet and greet session that Country Music needed a Latin Crossover. He wanted something to bring the Hispanic listeners over to Country. This told me that John Rich had made his decision before the contest ever began, and I still feel the same way. Julio was the winner. Not out of talent, but because the women swooned over him and he could bring a large audience to the world of country music.

To me the contest was exciting to watch, but quickly lost it when the final winner was announced. Julio was the least country person in the group. Least in appearance, in action, and in song, but the winner of the popularity and potential income. I think everyone else did better, but then again, what do I know? I don't have any full length fur coats, cowboy hats, cowboy boots. All I have is good taste. Obviously this means I am not a good judge of country. But I still hope they come back next season.