Monday, March 24, 2008

LISSA’S: After 31 + years, I AM SO FRIGGIN’ DONE!

Well that’s it. I am 31 years old and I have finally broken ties with my dad’s side of the family. This side of the family is close, but only between themselves. My mother and I were outcasts of the family anyways. My grandmother (by blood only) was furious at my mom for taking her only son away. She held that grudge to her until the day she died. She even had the nerve to go up to my mother when she was pregnant with me, get in her face, and say "That WAD in your belly is not my sons!". Well funny.. if I wasn’t my daddy’s girl, then why the hell do I look identical to my youngest aunt? Even the mega-beast grandmother couldn’t explain it. She even made me when I was a child, 5th grade (her granddaughter by blood) pay for half of my birthday present, while my mom (struggling to make ends meet) had to pay for the other half.


Now that the mega-beast grandmother has died, my aunt is carrying on her feelings. Here’s how it started:


I send out stupid and funny emails daily. This aunt is (was) in the list. The email that I sent out was found in Photobucket of 3 strangers and an oil painting of Christ. The painting had His hands up like a "Y".. and the other 3 guys were lined up next to it, gesturing with their arms "M" "C" "A". So it looks like the "YMCA" dance. That’s it. I found that to be a bit funny, with a twist of stupid. But my judgmental aunt replies to me back:


Just curious. Are you a believer in Christ? I guess the subject has never came up between you & I.


What is this?? Just because I send out one stupid picture joke of 3 guys I don’t even know, then she wants to question my religion? This is a PRIME example of my problem against religion.. at least the religion that’s in my family. I’m not saying I’ve got a problem with God.. I’m saying I’ve got a problem with judgmental "Holier Than Thou" people that criticize you and put you down no matter what.


So I replied this.. as lightly as I could because I didn’t want to make war:


Duh, of course I am.. but sorry, I don’t feel I owe you an explanation.


I am 31 years old and I truly feel I don’t owe any explanation to anyone.. even family. So then I get this snotty letter back from her:


YOU sent the disgusting crap to me and then act like I’ve done something to offend you??? You have got to be kidding And while you do not "owe me an explanation", you do owe me the courtesy of not sending me your trashy emails.


Does this sound very Christian-like? Family-like? Well it is according to the Elms family.


My own thoughts on her response stems all the way back from the day mom met my dad. It comes from the cold roots that the mega-beast installed in on her 3 daughters to hate their brother’s family. Why do I feel this way? Well let’s look at this:


My cousin (from my dad’s middle sister) is a so-called self acclaimed ordained Pentecostal minister. He goes to church like a good wind-up toy and puts on the best "Spiritual Show" he can perform. Oh.. according to the Elms family.. he does no wrong and because he is a "ordained minister" he will never do no wrong. Well this perfect "actor" just got married. Okay, nothing out of the ordinary about that for an "ordained minister". He has a MySpace page as well. Okay, nothing wrong with that. Well, combine the two, and this "ordained minister" lets some of his true side show. It’s funny to see what happens to an "ordained minister" when you take him away from an audience and put him with friends! There is a picture of him holding a very large blow-up penis.. and he is holding it in front of his crotch like it was his own penis with a big, proud smile on his face. Another photo had him at the beach with a large, obese woman in the background. She had no clue her picture was being taken. His caption for this picture was "Look out for the whale behind me". Not real Christian-like I say... Another photo had him standing in front of a Christmas tree holding 2 little round ornaments in front of his crotch area like they were his testicles, with a big smile on his face.


But yet, this family member is "all holy" and can never do no wrong! His sister is still in high school with 2 kids by 2 different daddys that aren’t even around! Oh, but this is an accepted Elms.. she can do no wrong either.


So this is the letter I get back:


I won’t talk to your dad about anything, you are a grown woman. Apparently its high time you speak for yourself because you seem to have been holding in ALOT.

I won’t argue with you about my mother not liking Teresa. She didn’t. Its not a secret. I won’t debate my mothers actions, or your mothers actions or my sisters actions or whatever nieces or nephews you may want to pull into this. I answer for MYSELF AND MYSELF ONLY.


Of course there is no debate about feelings in this family. When it comes to this sensitive subject and it makes the Elms look bad, it’s always "hush-hush".


I find this next couple of sections letter pretty funny...



I don’t judge ANYONE.....PERIOD. Not you, not Jason, not Crystal, not anyone. I’m not perfect, nobody is, but I do and will ALWAYS find a picture like that YMCA offensive.

You know, it occurred to me when I got that picture that you could be atheist for all I know. I know how you were raised but people do their own thing after they get grown. I just wondered where you stood on that. It was just a curiosity on my part, not a judgement. You shocked me when you sent back a reply pretty much telling me to sc - ew myself. So I fired one back not to send me trash. Reflex reaction.


Okay.. this is the judgemental-hypacritical part I am talking about. Let me quote: "I don’t judge ANYONE.....PERIOD"


But her next paragraph states this.. and I quote again: "You know, it occurred to me when I got that picture that you could be atheist for all I know. I know how you were raised but people do their own thing after they get grown."


Looks like to me she is judging my religion just because of one stupid pic I sent out from the internet.


This is the rest of it:

But I would very much like to hear of when I, ME, PHYLLIS has treated YOU, MELISSA badly. WHEN??? TELL ME! Don’t pull in everyone else in the family. I was there when you graduated high school. I was there when you got married. I try every year to remember your birthday. I’m not perfect at the birthday thing but I try. I would really like an answer and I think I deserve it if you are going make our relationship "dead". Lets at least make this about YOU & ME.


I quote again: "Don’t pull in everyone else in the family".. Well I guess it’s okay to look, point out and analyze my one decision to send a stupid email, but let’s not make note of the rest of the family’s sins? That’s what I get for being born on the shit bottom of this family’s todem pole.


I’m SO FREAKING DONE with this side of my hypocritical family... I wrote her back a long letter expressing my feelings, and told her to consider me dead.


I hate Hypocritical religious people... especially when it is blood.

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